Asparthame and wedding cake

Let me just start off by saying that there was no asparthame in my wedding cake...It was PURE sugar..: )

I actually have two situations here. (1) is that my best friend, Felicia has gotten me paranoid about asparthame...which is in just about EVERYTHING that I eat...it's in everything I thought was good for me...especially in diet drinks and anything that they've taken sugar out of pretty much. I LIVED for Diet Coke and now I feel bad drinking it. I won't go into the science of how horrid this asparthame stuff is for you...I just know that I read the article and got a little woozy. But then I figured "big deal", I can just cut out my DC, it won't KILL me...plus I need to drink more water anyway. So fine...then I figured I could just find another soft drink, diet of course, that didn't have asparthame in it...well, let me tell you - THERE ARE NONE ! ! ! And to make matters a little worse...I figured I'd do water...(maybe this whole asparthame thing is the water gods telling me I NEED more water) and just continue to add in my Crystal Light add in's. No big deal..well guess WHAT ! ! ! They ALSO have asparthame in them...I DID find one that didn't. After a long and exhaustive search, my hubby and I found one that was asparthame free. Thank goodness. So I was all water yesterday and proceeded to get up FOUR times last night to use the bathroom. I hope that little side effect is short lived. But I have to say that I DO feel better since I've been off asparthame. One thing that caught my eye about this article is that it says that asparthame, and/or products that contain it MAKE you crave carbs and more sugar...which in turn make you tired. It did make sense and believe me, I fought it all the way. But hubby and I have tried it and we've both noticed we are feeling better with more energy.

Ok, so my second issue is kind of a NSV. We still have wedding cake in the fridge and let me tell you, IT WAS AWESOME...well after supper last night, hubby wanted a piece then our neighbors walked over and they wanted a piece, then my son and his friend walked in and they wanted a piece (don't worry, there's enough leftover for a small army) but I fought the urge...none for me. So after everyone left and we got all settled in and were watching t.v. I was obsessing over this cake...In my mind, I kept thinking "I WANT CAKE"...it really was relentless, so I mentioned it to my hubby, who knows I want to lose weight...Bless his heart, he said "well, how about if I get you a real small piece. That will be enough to get a taste of it and not so much to hurt"...so of course I agreed before he could change his mind. : ) As he was getting my little slice of heaven, I decided to take my makeup off. And as I was doing this, it hit me that I didn't need this piece of cake and would only feel incredibly guilty after eating it...so I told him to just go ahead and wrap it up and I'd eat it at another time. I was SOOOO proud of myself. I do have to admit that I wept a little bit as he was walking away with that slice of heaven. : ) But I felt so good about doing it. It's little things like that that keep me going. That make me proud of myself and give me motivation to keep on keeping on. I have my first WI this Wednesday and I'm hoping for good results. I really want this.

Gotta get with it

Ok, so I am now a happily married woman...and as deliriously happy as I am, I am probably happier that it's all OVER...Darryl and I chose to do the wedding ourselves and it ended up being waaay more expensive than we expected but it was beautiful and we wouldn't trade a penny of it...

BUT when I got the pictures from the photographer, I couldn't believe how big I looked. I mean, I KNOW I'm a fluffy girl...I don't have any other delusions about myself, but it always seems that even though you know you're overweight, you never truly believe you're "that big" until you actually see it on glossy paper. : ) I want to make the commitment to myself to do better...to be healthier for ME...I have been on the yo yo roller coaster long enough now. I want to lose weight so that I feel good and get my self confidence back. I really miss that little bugger. But it's a commitment that for some reason, I can't seem to stick to...maybe I should say "don't" instead of "can't"...I KNOW it can be done...

I figure I'll trade off one bad habit a week. For this week, it's diet drinks. A friend of mine sent me this email talking about how bad aspartame is for you. I've heard this before and it might or might not be true, but I do need to lessen how much Splenda I use. I LIVE off this stuff. Even if I don't get it in my diet coke, I put it in my coffee ALL DAY long and that can't be good for me. I don't know what I'll substitute in it's place, but I'll find something. I've heard that Stevia is good stuff...but who knows these days. You don't know what to eat/drink/breath in etc...one day it's great for you and the next, it's going to cause your death...???

I have to say when I read my friend Caroline's blog, I get such inspiration. She has done awesome on this life changing weight loss journey. I'm SOOOO proud of her. Keep it up Caroline and send some of that willpower and determination my way. BTW, the pic of you and your niece is great. I can really tell in your face that you've lost. WOO HOO.

So, I'm asking for all the "getyourbuttingear" vibes I can get.